Deadlifts and I struggle to get along. Always.
I did have a 13# PR in July...at 198#...and was overjoyed. Hugs were even squished out to Jerimiah. But it was months before I got even close again. Partly it was just the way the programming block was built. But then even at the end...it was still basically the ceiling. Squeezing out 200# 5 months later gave me mixed feelings. Yeah, it was more. But the smallest amount. And that was really all I had in me. Was it that going to be it? And if it was, then what!?
And then at the beginning of February I threw my back out...doing deadlifts, of course. We were doing reps (and reps, and reps) and the fatigue was building and I lost form. It was pretty bad. Tears. Doctor. Meds. Physio.
So I didn't train for a bit, and then did but ensured NO stress to back. I missed squats but didn't miss deadlifts one bit. I felt like they had met me down. Or I had let me down.
Well, we started up again, and I screwed up my optimism and told myself to just do the work and trust the process. It was hard. It was a few sessions of back to basics and changing things up. I was all awkward AND had low numbers and didn't have the excuse that I was a #newb. But I kept at it ....with a slightly wavering faith that it would build up to...something different.
And it did. A 5# PR at 205#....With maybe a bit left in the tank. Evidence! Finally a little translation into the actual lift.
Let's be honest: even at twice the increase in the previous 5 months, its a tiny increase. But it's the encouragement I needed to remind me that trusting the process is not about blind faith, but rather about relying on what you know and who you trust ...and sticking it out.
I'm elated about the result, but even more so by this little gift of the encouraging reminder that progress comes ....as long as you keep at it.
We just wrapped on a vacation to COUPLES .... and it was such an amazing rest. We are not really much for "adventure vacations" per se. We already really enjoy our life/lives and aren't looking to a vacation to fill it up with parties, thrills or physical exertion. A real vacation for us is a rest. Not just the lack of daily obligations, but almost a mandate to just "chill out already". Garth already has that down pat, but I struggle. It would be easy for me to find stuff to fill the time. And for some, that might be just what the doctor ordered, but for me; a good vacation is a serious reboot; complete with some time just being....being. Still. Quiet. Sometimes listening to music, or reading. Or a walk. But mostly just a nice slow crawl, a slower pace in the brain, and a release of "need to be doing" for my heart.
And I sit here on our patio for the last 1/2 hour before leaving, feeling grateful for this opportunity, and equally thankful for the life we return to. There is not even a hint of wistfulness about leaving.
All of this leaves me feeling immensely blessed and grateful.
We ease back in tomorrow. Laundry. I'll go to the gym and train. Then back to work on Thursday; full steam ahead.
My meet is around 14 weeks out. I have a whole cycle to work through, and hypertrophy starts tomorrow. I am eager for the work, for the inevitable progress, for the opportunity to practice. For the endorphins. :)
And work is really humming. I love the product and it's shaping up to be a fun and challenging 2017.
After firing of a killer back spasm 2 weeks ago, I am back at it. Well, not ALL of it. I did air squats on Saturday. Very light weight on Sunday. A bit heavier, but still light on Monday. And today went back to a regular(ish) load.
Still it's 10# lower than where we left off, so I have lost (arguably) the 2 weeks, plus another week to get back to that weight. First blush that didn't make me happy, but it's a quick head-space adjustment to realize that 3 weeks is really not that much. I had some fear, but really focused on the balance between listening to my body, but also remembering that it sometimes is lazy and lies. So a reasonable weight, and long rests, no rushing. Feels like JUST the thing to get over the nagging apprehension.
I am still going to skip deads on friday (or do block pulls instead). The 3 weeks progress lost is OK, but the crappy week in a back spasm... not really something I want to repeat. And I have a business trip starting Sunday, so that means no real deadlifts for at least another week. Then I should be golden!
I was on a charge in January, and really enjoying it. Until...(wait for it...) a less than perfect deadlift. Thankfully, it's not an injury per se. But my lower back went into spasm and has been very very painful, tight and at times totally immobilized at the bottom.
2 massages helped. Then an attempted row made it even worse. DOCTOR! Muscle relaxant, anti inflammatories and Advil. And physio therapy. I have had some pain-free moments but 8 hours on my back tighten it up quick so I think it will be a bit before I am back in good shape.
I have been feeling off since the 12th. Not totally horrible, just not well. Quite a few headaches. More tired. I feel great until around mid-day, and then like deaths warmer cousin. It's likely 'just' fatigue.
But I can't seem to shake it, and a week of going to bed at 8 PM hasn't fixed it, so I am taking a 1/2 day sick day and going to bed. I am hoping that 3-4 hours of sleep this afternoon and another early night, will fill the energy-bank enough to kick-to-the-curb whatever it is that's getting me under the weather.
I have traveled quite a bit lately. Just domestic, but still away from home, away from my honey, away from the cats.
My shoulder is killing me: not sure if it's the strange beds (hotels, so not like strange, but.... strange). Or carrying a 800 pound back pack. :)
Going to go home tonight. Day off tomorrow and celebrate with Garth his birthday. And another day off for me Thursday....and I'll go lift. (yay!). And then get a massage. All on the shoulder. :)
... is exactly like this past week. :)
No drama or anything. It's been a bit busy. A bit of extra travel. A bit of a chest cold. I also stopped food tracking, because I felt a bit of pressure stacking up. So I turned on the compassion. At least I hope it's that and not me slacking.
I still went to the gym; I figured that while I might have an excuse to be able to do a bit less..... I had no excuse to do less than I was able.
Blech. I feel crappy. A little weepy even. I have just tired myself out.
Granted, I have been pushing a lot of work on the tattoo (my artist is moving, so time is of the essense....) and I would say that the amount of time I have put in over 4 weeks is not exactly what you'd call.... compassionate. So it's not like I don't know where it's coming from.
Nevertheless, I have become so used to feeling good that feeling bad just feels.... bad.
And since I generally share lots of up-side, I thought I'd share this too. You know, with myself, and my future self. It's not always awesome.
But even so, it's still pretty good.
I feel a bit off today. Just minda .... meh.
I gymed on my own on Saturday (did with J on the Friday), and it was less than stellar. I struggled and only did 1 squat before opting to .... not. Then I did some AMRAP arm stuff that I have done WAY more reps of before.
Sunday was listless. Not bad. Just kinda um, another word for listless, please? And today: a bit the same. Melancholy. I trained, and it was good, but still feel kinda weary. I have felt SO good for SO long, that it's a bit unsettling, actually.
Maybe I need a bit of a napping weekend, or something. On the PLUS,... i have Wednesday off as a planned recovery to a (Korn) concert. So maybe a big sleep in and 2 naps will do the trick.
I'm on another business trip this week. I got into the gym yesterday, but now I won't be back until Friday. That means three days out of my home gym.
And I have an event on Saturday with a girlfriend, that means no training with Jerimiah on Saturday either.
Of course there is a gym at the hotel; and Jerimiah mentioned the same. But.....
I hit the snooze button almost a dozen times this morning. I'm tired. Two of my last three workouts were really frustrating. And business travel is tiring.
So.... While I'm going to see how I feel, I decided I won't go to the gym here unless I really feel like it.
Compassion (along with restraint, control and some others) is one of my themes for this year. Including compassion for myself.
I'm hoping this decision is a compassionate one and not a lazy one.