I got really irritated this morning at the gym when a stranger said "no no no for god sake don't hurt yourself " and handed me 10 pound weights in place of my 17. 5s. I don't think he would've done it if I was a dude. But I also think he was genuinely trying to help. Is there a "right" way to correct a strangers form at the gym?

See last post.  Repeat.  Crapped out on 205# deadlift making this officially NOT better than anything I have ever done before.   

Ruminated a bit.  It's weird, because I have spent quite a bit of the last few months wanting to try for best single... to see what was really possible (vs theorhitcally RPE Xreps blah blah blah) and looking forward to test week.  And now that it's here I hatee that it guarantees failure. That's the whole point, after all. 

And I am not that good at dealing, it turns out.  I am not entirely sure if I'd feel the same if I squeezed out more, or it's just hitting a limit that's a bummer.  ie:

1. Do I feel bad because I didn't gain enough to feel good? 
   
2. Or do I feel bad because i just don't like going over the limit-cliff no matter what the number is? 
   

Now I have a new reason to want to hit good numbers on the real testing day tomorrow.  I want a good.... everything. Something worth celebrating.  And then to see how I feel.   Just so I know which of the 2 above it is .  Oh, who am I kidding?  I just want better numbers.  Period.  It's not a social experiment. It's not noble.  Just gimme a fucking material PR already!!!

Blech.  I feel crappy.  A little weepy even.  I have just tired myself out.

Granted, I have been pushing a lot of work on the tattoo (my artist is moving, so time is of the essense....) and I would say that the amount of time I have put in over 4 weeks is not exactly what you'd call.... compassionate.   So it's not like I don't know where it's coming from.

Nevertheless,  I have become so used to feeling good that feeling bad just feels.... bad. 

And since I generally share lots of up-side, I thought I'd share this too.   You know, with myself, and my future self. It's not always awesome.

But even so, it's still pretty good.

Had a crappy day in the gym. I was PT-less but should have been ok.  The target was set in a text the night before....

I checked video of what felt like ass-to-grass 135#.... And it was barely parallel.  I worked up anyway . 140 and 145 were about the same.   I finished with the triples and consoled myself that while my depth wasn't cutting it, that I had done the work and it would at least contribute to improvement.
I told JW the same.  He wanted to know why I had not backed off on the weight and focused on depth.   :(
And its cause I didn't have depth anyway....

Oops. No.  No I did not.   And we had talked about it.  Argh!
So if I feel good tomorrow.... I'll go in and just do something light... But hang out at the bottom.  Like me told  too.
And that is why I still need a PT.