Deadlifts and I  struggle to get along.  Always.  

I did have a 13# PR in July...at 198#...and was overjoyed.   Hugs were even squished out to Jerimiah.   But it was months before I got even close again.  Partly it was just the way the programming block was built.  But then even at the end...it was still basically the ceiling.   Squeezing out 200# 5 months later gave me mixed feelings.  Yeah, it was more.  But the smallest amount.  And that was really all I had in me.   Was it that going to be it?  And if it was, then what!?
 
And then at the beginning of February I threw my back out...doing deadlifts, of course.  We were doing reps (and reps, and reps) and the fatigue was building and I lost form.  It was pretty bad.   Tears.  Doctor.  Meds.  Physio.   
 
So I didn't train for a bit, and then did but ensured NO stress to back.  I missed squats but didn't miss deadlifts one bit.  I felt like they had met me down.  Or I had let me down.  
 
Well, we started up again, and I screwed up my optimism and told myself to just do the work and trust the process.   It was hard.  It was a few sessions of back to basics and changing things up.  I was all awkward AND had low numbers and didn't have the excuse that I was a #newb.  But I kept at it ....with a slightly wavering faith that it would build up to...something different.  
 
And it did.  A 5# PR at 205#....With maybe a bit left in the tank.  Evidence!   Finally a little translation into the actual lift.  

Let's be honest:  even at twice the increase in the previous 5 months, its a tiny increase.  But it's the encouragement I needed to remind me that trusting the process is not about blind faith, but rather about relying on what you know and who you trust ...and sticking it out.  
 
I'm elated about the result, but even more so by this little gift of the encouraging reminder that progress comes ....as long as you keep at it.   

Yeah, I know that's a cat. But I was thinking ... if "hair of the dog" is taking some more of what made you busted in the first place... then "hair of the cat" could be something that should mess you up worse but fixes you. Right?

Anyway... I think we've made a breakthrough on the back spasms. My RMT had mentioned that more ballistic style stretching might be better, and to save the long holds for after I work out. The idea being that I'm relaxing the muscle right before a big load, and that could be what was driving me to cramp up. So JW incorporated a few more things in to the warm up last week and it made a difference. I've even been "Frankenstein walking" around work (Hidden hallway… But it probably has cameras) and it's made a massive difference. Today we added a few more things. Had the best day yet.
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Super relieved. Based on the numbers, you couldn't exactly call it an excellent session under the bar but, it felt good. More importantly, I feel good. I think I was going into a bit of withdrawal...

My back is better, but glutes are beyond sore.  Like frozen boulders and some movements seem to put that stress back in the lower back.  Squat depth sucks although it gets better and better feeling as I do more.   But right back to crap again each AM.   Physio this weekend did nothing, so I think a massage is in order.  Will try to book one for this week as this is seriously killing my buzz.   

After firing of a killer back spasm 2 weeks ago, I am back at it.  Well, not ALL of it.  I did air squats on Saturday.  Very light weight on Sunday.  A bit heavier, but still light on Monday.  And today went back to a regular(ish) load. 

Still it's 10# lower than where we left off, so I have lost (arguably) the 2 weeks, plus another week to get back to that weight.    First blush that didn't make me happy, but it's a quick head-space adjustment to realize that 3 weeks is really not that much.     I had some fear, but really focused on the balance between listening to my body, but also remembering that it sometimes is lazy and lies.   So a reasonable weight, and long rests, no rushing.   Feels like JUST the thing to get over the nagging apprehension.

I am still going to skip deads on friday (or do block pulls instead).    The 3 weeks progress lost is OK, but the crappy week in a back spasm... not really something I want to repeat.  And I have a  business trip starting Sunday, so that means no real deadlifts for at least  another week.    Then I should be golden!