I have a coach. Many, actually....

I had a Personal Trainer for over a year.   And then I had a coach.  It was an easy transition because it’s the same guy.   Let’s call him Jerimiah…  (Because that’s his name….)
 
In March 2016 , spurred on by a growing love of powerlifting and Jerimiahs recent place (the TOP) at Nationals…. I decided to participate in a summer Powerlifting meet.   The London Open, to be specific.   Initially, I only asked him to help get me ready.    But when I eventually (reluctantly) asked if he’d be there to support me, he was surprised I had considered that there’d be any other option.  And at that moment, it started feeling just a bit different.  

In the past, when he said “we”, I often laughed.  “We can do this”, he’d say.  And I’d think “We? I don’t see you picking up the other end of the barbell!  Is that some training-speak to encourage me?”   But not long after we started prepping for the meet;   it really felt like WE!    And now, the value I put into this relationship is kind of shocking.  Personally, in some ways he remains nearly a stranger.    But I trust him with a lot.   I rely on his guidance, support and feedback.    So how did it become “we”, exactly?  Well, here is what I see now:

• We both have accountability to be present.  Not just at 6:30 AM physically, but working with intent, purposefully
• We talk … to help sorting out how I feel when things aren’t working… Fear about getting hurt, looking bad, feeling weak
• He works to modify what we do  both to  accommodate when I struggle, or push a little extra when I’m on a tear
• He gives me cues that he knows trigger the kind of effort I need to succeed
• We celebrate successes. Granted, his ‘stoked’ is a little more chill than mine…
• We plan. We talk about the plan.  We look back at how we did compared to plan…
• He’s available.   Granted, not 24/7, but for a little dropped line, or question, or joke
• WE…. really are WE.  At least when it comes to this little venture, we are in it together

 
So has his approach changed?  Actually, I have to sheepishly admit that it probably hasn’t.  Those things actually didn’t start when I committed to the meet: they were there before.  It was my perspective that changed.   Yes, I did specifically ask for him to ‘have my back’ and got his commitment.   But the only real change in approach was mine.   So I had a coach all along, but didn’t know it.  My bad.
 
And now I look around at people giving me feedback in my personal life or at work, and think: Maybe they are my coaches too?   The push to own something.  Or the encouragement to give it up.  The dialogue to help me sort out how I feel, and what’s on my mind.   Suggestions to consider modifying my approach.  A pat on the back for a little win...... Sound familiar?  It’s the SAME things I listed above that I value in my relationship with Jerimiah.    I don’t always take the feedback from others as easily as I do with Jerimiah.   Maybe its because it does not feel like “personal coaching” because of their approach.  But maybe it’s also because of my perspective.  And that, I can change.

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